![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sparrow015Title: No More Pizza Monkey!
Series: One-Shot
Author: Sparrow
Fandom: Magnificent Seven: ATF and Attack of the Killer Tomatoes
Characters: Buck Wilmington, Ezra Standish and a special appearance.
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I do not own Magnificent Seven or Attack of the Killer Tomatoes in any way, shape or form. Any original characters, I do own.
Spoilers: None.
Author’s Note: It’s simple, silly crack!fic designed to cheer up![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
strangevisitor7 and the bad news her family received. Also, this fic is unbeta’d except run through a spell check. Any spelling mistakes are my own. Enjoy folks!
Summary: The local pizza store, Donatos is selling evil pizza attacking the citizens of Denver. No, really – EVIL PIZZA!
Buck and Ezra looked at one another and then looked at the local pizza store - Donatos. It was filled with evil pizza.
No, really!
EVIL PIZZA!
A few pies tried to eat the rest of Team Seven when they ordered in for a night of football at the CDC. After squishing the pizza under a heavy table, JD quickly hacked into the main computer network of Donatos and found out where the orders had gone to in the city. Team Seven – minus Buck and Ezra – were off rounding the pizza pies up and saving the people from being eaten.
Shaking his head, Ezra could only think that his cousin Chad Finletter was right – tomatoes were evil.
Now, he and Buck were at the main store to blow it up and put a stop to these evil pies.
Looking at his bag of supplies, he quickly emptied it out and started making homemade bombs.
“AHHHH!!!”
They looked up to see a man crash through the front window, waving a pizza cutter in front of him and duelling with a fearsome pizza that looked like an angry vegetarian.
“BACK!! BACK!!” The man cried out as he cut into the pie with the pizza cutter.
It gave off an agonizing scream as it started to fizzle and soon there was only a small pile of dough on the street.
Quickly hurrying over, Buck put a concerned hand on the man’s shoulder. “You all right, pard?”
“Am I alright?” The man parroted the question back as he looked at Buck like he was crazy. “Here I was, minding my own business, relaxing and making pizza’s when I got attacked by killer pizza pie and you ask if I’m all right?”
“Bit of a dumb question,” Buck sheepishly replied back.
“Ya think?” The man replied back.
“The munitions are ready, Mr. Wilmington,” Ezra replied as he handed one of the homemade bombs to Buck – very carefully.
“You’re going to blow it up?”
“Indeed we are, Mr...?” Ezra let the question trail off.
“Jeff and let me have one of those bombs! I tell ya! I give years of my life to make this store one of the best in city and how does the corporation thank me? By trying to have me die by pizza!” Jeff ranted. “NO MORE WILL I BE THEIR PIZZA MONKEY!! NO MORE!!” He cackled as he grabbed one of the bombs and lobbed it at the store.
Ezra and Buck exchanged a look and lobbed their own bombs at the store and watched the building burn up.
“Uh, you’re not going to arrest me or anything, right?” Jeff asked suddenly as he pointed at their badges clipped to their pants.
“Didn’t see a thing, did you, Ez?” Buck asked.
“I fear I might have to see the Optometrist, Buck,” Ezra replied back with a sly wink and a flash of his gold tooth. “You know my vision isn’t quite what it used to be.”
Sighing in relief, Jeff ran to his car, got in and drove off.
“Nice fella,” Buck commented.
“And I can’t believe I’m saying this, but we got rid of the killer pizza’s,” Ezra grinned.
“You know that sounds like it could be a movie or sumthin’,” Buck said, cheered by the thought.
“Just as long as we don’t have to sing Puberty Love,” Ezra muttered.
“What was that, Ez?”
“Nothing, Buck, nothing,” Ezra said and dug his cell phone out. “Let us call our compatriots and see how they are fairing.”
“Sounds like a plan!” Buck grinned.
The two walked back to their car and drove off into the sunset, with the Donatos building burning behind them.
And the killer pizza had been thwarted – for now.
THE END?
Series: One-Shot
Author: Sparrow
Fandom: Magnificent Seven: ATF and Attack of the Killer Tomatoes
Characters: Buck Wilmington, Ezra Standish and a special appearance.
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I do not own Magnificent Seven or Attack of the Killer Tomatoes in any way, shape or form. Any original characters, I do own.
Spoilers: None.
Author’s Note: It’s simple, silly crack!fic designed to cheer up
strangevisitor7 and the bad news her family received. Also, this fic is unbeta’d except run through a spell check. Any spelling mistakes are my own. Enjoy folks!Summary: The local pizza store, Donatos is selling evil pizza attacking the citizens of Denver. No, really – EVIL PIZZA!
Buck and Ezra looked at one another and then looked at the local pizza store - Donatos. It was filled with evil pizza.
No, really!
EVIL PIZZA!
A few pies tried to eat the rest of Team Seven when they ordered in for a night of football at the CDC. After squishing the pizza under a heavy table, JD quickly hacked into the main computer network of Donatos and found out where the orders had gone to in the city. Team Seven – minus Buck and Ezra – were off rounding the pizza pies up and saving the people from being eaten.
Shaking his head, Ezra could only think that his cousin Chad Finletter was right – tomatoes were evil.
Now, he and Buck were at the main store to blow it up and put a stop to these evil pies.
Looking at his bag of supplies, he quickly emptied it out and started making homemade bombs.
“AHHHH!!!”
They looked up to see a man crash through the front window, waving a pizza cutter in front of him and duelling with a fearsome pizza that looked like an angry vegetarian.
“BACK!! BACK!!” The man cried out as he cut into the pie with the pizza cutter.
It gave off an agonizing scream as it started to fizzle and soon there was only a small pile of dough on the street.
Quickly hurrying over, Buck put a concerned hand on the man’s shoulder. “You all right, pard?”
“Am I alright?” The man parroted the question back as he looked at Buck like he was crazy. “Here I was, minding my own business, relaxing and making pizza’s when I got attacked by killer pizza pie and you ask if I’m all right?”
“Bit of a dumb question,” Buck sheepishly replied back.
“Ya think?” The man replied back.
“The munitions are ready, Mr. Wilmington,” Ezra replied as he handed one of the homemade bombs to Buck – very carefully.
“You’re going to blow it up?”
“Indeed we are, Mr...?” Ezra let the question trail off.
“Jeff and let me have one of those bombs! I tell ya! I give years of my life to make this store one of the best in city and how does the corporation thank me? By trying to have me die by pizza!” Jeff ranted. “NO MORE WILL I BE THEIR PIZZA MONKEY!! NO MORE!!” He cackled as he grabbed one of the bombs and lobbed it at the store.
Ezra and Buck exchanged a look and lobbed their own bombs at the store and watched the building burn up.
“Uh, you’re not going to arrest me or anything, right?” Jeff asked suddenly as he pointed at their badges clipped to their pants.
“Didn’t see a thing, did you, Ez?” Buck asked.
“I fear I might have to see the Optometrist, Buck,” Ezra replied back with a sly wink and a flash of his gold tooth. “You know my vision isn’t quite what it used to be.”
Sighing in relief, Jeff ran to his car, got in and drove off.
“Nice fella,” Buck commented.
“And I can’t believe I’m saying this, but we got rid of the killer pizza’s,” Ezra grinned.
“You know that sounds like it could be a movie or sumthin’,” Buck said, cheered by the thought.
“Just as long as we don’t have to sing Puberty Love,” Ezra muttered.
“What was that, Ez?”
“Nothing, Buck, nothing,” Ezra said and dug his cell phone out. “Let us call our compatriots and see how they are fairing.”
“Sounds like a plan!” Buck grinned.
The two walked back to their car and drove off into the sunset, with the Donatos building burning behind them.
And the killer pizza had been thwarted – for now.
THE END?
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2009-10-15 12:42 pm (UTC)-bs
no subject
Date: 2009-10-15 12:57 pm (UTC)